Because I can't stop taking them . . .

Yes, and a self portrait. I'm itching to try some new ideas, but, when I saw the arrows pointing me forward, I knew I had to look back. What do you leave behind when you move forward?

Out of Body

Increasingly, I have been struggling to stay on this planet. Especially over break, I found my mind wandering, whether I'm with a lot of people or on my own, not completely here or engaged. It's an odd feeling. I'm doing a lot of dreaming, but not a lot of "being" in a physical sense. My body is here, but my mind is focused on other things, on my Self, on a song, on just not being a part of the violence and cruelty and terrible occurrences that, to me, seem to be escalating in this world. I'm not sure if I'm strong enough to deal with it right now-- at this point apathy is becoming a friend. Or at least a fake friend. Because I'm not really a fan of not caring. And, really, I do. I just don't know what to do about it right now. I guess I'm just going to continue working on my escape plan.  

Sunset Afternoons and Power Lines

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Ice Patterns

I love water, in it's various states. In this case, half frozen puddles and bogs caught my attention with some stunning patters and glittering crevices.

More photos!

Winter Daze

Back in my childhood hometown for a bit and the urge to shoot again has surfaced, as the chaos of finals and work are behind me. I've been going back to the places I usually frequent-- mostly the woods. On these trails, I feel at "home", thinking about my current situation and how it mirrors the forest at this time.

The woods have always been a place of solace for me. I love the simplicity and complexity, existing all at once. I love the fresh air and the quiet, yet constant humming that occurs. There is a stillness you can find when walking in between the trees, a comfort and safety that I find lacking in between four plaster walls.
  

Now, the forest is very quiet. Winter has desaturated the woods, leaving lovely, muted colors. It is simple, it is peaceful, and it is very still. I relate to this feeling, of being somewhere in between. The colorful clash of autumn is over and rest is needed before spring comes and makes it's energetic demands. I, too, feel the embrace of relaxation, hanging in there until decisions need to be made. This melancholy feeling is helpful- it makes me think about what I desire and what I feel now. There is a joyful exuberance beneath the surface, but now is a time to be still, detached. An observer. More from the woods.
  

Clean Cut

This feels (and looks) like I'm right back at the beginning. In a way, it is. But in another way, it's not. 

Some times there are points in our lives where we need to make a decision. We are clinging to something we don't really want/need/desire anymore, yet, because of the past (memories, emotions, comforts) we don't let go. We may attempt to make the old fit into our new lives through a variety of ways, but still find we are not happy. 

This is when we need to make a clean cut. Those things we are holding onto, that we can't effectively live in the moment with, need to go. We know if we keep them in our lives, if only for a small part, they will start to take over again and leave us unsure, unhappy, and stagnant.

I'm glad I decided this was it. I feel so free, unburdened, relieved. It hurt, but I've been dealing with hurt for awhile now. I'm a strong person. So are you. We can all have what we want in this life as long as we listen to our wise inner selves. It can be scary, it can be painful, it can be unstable. But, by not making a choice and living in limbo, we are setting ourselves up for something so much worse.

Spoon

Playing at the dinner table.